Wednesday, September 14, 2011

iPhone 5 Release Date - You Heard It Here First
That's right, here is all the 100% guaranteed* information you have been waiting for on the iPhone 5.  Release date, features, and more.  Now, here's a rundown of the facts:

  1. To be released on October 1, 2011 at 6:18:20 PM PST
    • Why that time?  Apparently the number had significance to Steve Jobs
    • Hey, at least we know the exact moment it will be out in stores
  2. A new camera will feature
    • 100 megapixels for better-than-professional quality
    • 30 x optical zoom lens
    • Wind-resistant boom microphone option
    • Face recognition technology will automatically tag the pictures for contacts in your address book
  3. Instant coffee maker
    • Manufacturer Keurig has been hard at work making the new iCup (kind of like the K-Cup but smaller and more mobile)
    • Only caffeinated flavors are available from Green Mountain and Starbucks, but decaf will be coming within 6 months
    • Rumors say you can brew up to 3 cups on a battery charge
    • Stir stick can be inserted into the handy slot in the corner of the phone for storage (like a Nintendo DSi stylus)
  4. Built-in AM/FM Radio tuner
  5. High-gain antenna to avoid reception issues experienced in an earlier model - telescoping to an unbelievable 4 feet
  6. 8-Track, Beta, and VHS cassette tape adapters optional so you can listen to, and watch, your entertainment directly on your phone
  7. Unisex Razor
    • That's right, built right into that slim top edge is a men's/women's razor screen with an easy dump tray
    • Battery life is good for one shave a day and normal 4 hour talk time; or 1 shave, 1 cup of coffee, and 1 hour talk time
  8. Fold-out pliers
  9. Large jack knife
  10. Extensible toothpick

* Who makes these guarantees anyway?  Aw, fuggeddaboudit.

So, are you buying it?  I just couldn't resist - just saw a post in the iPhone Developer's Forum asking for the release date - oddly enough, it had no replies in 7 days!  Can you believe it?

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